Couples Therapy: Determining If Your Marriage Can Be Saved

When you get married, there is that honeymoon period when you think that together you can take on the world and survive anything. While a few lucky couples feel that way throughout their marriage, most aren’t as lucky.

That’s not to say they won’t survive because they certainly can — but as a therapist in Chevy Chase, MD, from an office like Lindsey Hoskins & Associates can explain, some couples need a little help in learning how to navigate life’s bumpier moments — together. None of us are born experts on communicating with each other; sometimes, a helping hand is needed.

Seeking out help can be hard. You don’t know what to expect from the process, which can be intimidating. Here are some answers to a few common areas of concern.

How do we know if we need counseling?

Sometimes it’s easy to know, but it’s not that clear if you’re experiencing a crisis. It could be helpful if one or both of you aren’t feeling like you’re being supported or nurtured or that you’re having a hard time communicating with each other. 

How do we know if we have the right therapist?

It isn’t always easy to please everyone simultaneously, but it is important that both of you feel comfortable expressing yourselves to your therapist. You want someone who will respond to your feedback and who helps you both feel heard.

Many things can factor into choosing your therapist — including location and their specialties. It is good to ask questions of your potential therapist to see if they are a good fit for your needs.

How long are these sessions?

While it can vary, most therapy sessions last 50 minutes.

What is therapy like?

Everyone has different needs and goals, so it depends on the two of you and what you’re looking to get out of it. The more you put in and participate, the better the outcome will be. The goal is to give you the tools to improve your relationship and communication.

What will our relationship look like after therapy?

The goal is that you will be closer by the end and feel supported by the other. You will hopefully have the tools to deal with fights or disagreements more positively so that they don’t feel like the end of your relationship and will happen less often. 

What happens if my spouse won’t join me?

While it would be ideal for you to come together to work on the problems in your relationship, making sure you get the support you need is also important. 

Will what we talk about remain confidential?

It is extremely important to the trust between a therapist, and their clients that everything said in a therapy session remains confidential. If there comes a time that you want someone else to know (like an outside doctor), you may permit disclosure.

The only exception would be if it appears the client is in danger, either from an outside source or self-harm. 

If you have any more questions or concerns about couples therapy or would like to make an appointment, please contact a therapist today.